Tuesday 27 January 2015

Where do you want to be buried come next year?

I bet youre wondering whats with the question right? Well, you might not but im still going to have to tell you:-)

The other day, the 22nd of January, I was at Leopards Hill Cemetry for the 3rd time since the year began. Its been quite the start to a year. The first time was a memorial for a dear uncle who has been gone for just over a year. It was a beautiful event. You would have said the same if you were there. It was just nice to see his family evidently still celebrating his life and testifying how faithful God has been to them over this one year. The other two were for the burial of a cousin and a friends Aunt.

In the space of 27 days, 4 people that I know have died. 2 died in their sleep, 1 died after she underwent an operation and the last was unwell for sometime then eventually passed on at home.
Why am I saying all this? When the news of funerals kept coming pretty much every week, I was really going through a period of much thinking. I felt God was trying to speak to me. In my conversation with a friend after the three sudden deaths, I said:
" I feel shaken, they were all unexpected. Hmmm whats God trying to say. Its all too close to home. Im just scared for what else will unfold this year"

I have this thing that I do. Whenever something happens, I like to stop and think of what God is trying to say to me. Its actually very helpful. Here's some free advice: When you don't understand what's happening and why it's happening, take some to stop and think of why God allowed it and what he could be trying to say to you through the situation before you. You'll be amazed how circumstances will shape you for the better.

So, yes, I was thinking about what God was trying to say to me. Then it became more clear on the 22nd and I thought I'd share it with you and shake the dust off my blog.

While I was at the burial of my friends aunt, I went to the place where my own aunt, Aunt Mukalo, who passed on almost 4 years ago was buried. A tombstone was recently put there, so I wanted to see it and just have a moment. While there I took a picture and I sent it to the family for them to see. When I got home I was talking about it with Mwindula, my oldest brother.

Mwindula: So come next year where do you want to be buried?
Me: Errrrmmm *quite shocked and moved by his question but trying to pretend its cool*
Mwindula: Ha ha ha ha! You should have seen the look on your face! Priceless! Thats the problem, you love this life too much!
Me thinking: Well atleast one of us found this funny

Anyway, the thing is, It left me wondering if he was right. And he was. I have held on so tight to this world because i feel like I'll be here forever more than I'd like to admit. The deaths shook me, they hit me like a train, the scales fell off my eyes and I realized that I am NOT superhuman and I could die any day. This doesnt mean that I should live constantly thinking about death and living in constant fear of losing those dear to me. Mwindula was basically trying to me tell that I love the world. A new friend of mine and I made an agreement to memorize two verses a week together, and weird enough the memory verse at that time was:
1 John 2:15-17
Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world then the love of the father is not in him...... for the world and its desires pass away but the man who does the will of God lives forever.

I went into a moment of reflection. The truth is that the world and all its desires WILL pass away. Whether I like it or not, whether I am comfortable with it or not and whether i accept it or not. The main reason why I tend to find this world so nice is because of the desires I look forward to fulfilling in this life, and I must say that they are so exciting and pretty awesome. But truth is it isnt promised that I will live to fulfill these desires because the world as well as the very desires will pass away. So... what matters? The only thing that ultimately matters is doing the will of God. In that, eternal life is found as we are told in this passage; the man who does the will of God will live forever.

Back to my message to my friend. I see two problems with my message now that I've had time to digest it. No, its not the fact that I was shaken. Its okay to be shaken every once in a while. I'd like to think it is pretty healthy actually because it reminds us that this world is not our home. We are really just passing through.
1. I was scared.
The Bible says in John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.

As a child of God in such moments one needs to remember that God left his peace with us. Because of this amazing gift of peace, in the face lifes circumstances, our hearts must neither be troubled nor afraid.

2. I feared for the future.
The Bible says in Psalm 62: 8
Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.

Psalm 18: 30
This God–his way is perfect;the word of the LORD proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.

So what ought we to do when we think of the future? TRUST. Who? GOD.  When? at ALL times. No, no exceptions, no matter how crazy and insane the situation looks, no matter how the future seems uncertain, still no exceptions. Why? His way is perfect. You may be wondering, what if you still have fears? Pour out your heart before him. What can he do anyway? He will be your refuge.

The two passages both bring out God's ability to be a refuge.
A refuge is a place of safety, relief or escape.
I now see that God can be all that to me if I trust him. My place of safety, my place of relief and my place of escape. And the awesome news is he can be all that and more to you too.


"There is a place of full relief,  near to the heart of God.
A place where all is joy and peace, near to the heart of God"


So in the face of uncertainity and even as i learn to love God and let go of my grip on this world that is like vapor (hope you too see the silliness in trying to hold on tightly to vapor), I am made to remember that God is all I need to hold on to. He is all I need to love. He is all I need to obey. He is my shield. He is my refuge. God is all I need in this life.
I hope you now realize it too, he should be all in all to you whether or not you have to be buried come next year.