Friday 5 February 2016

Sincerely yours, A University Graduate

After my 4 year experience in University I decided to share some tips that I thought would be helpful to those starting university or college soon as well as those who are already in it.

There are some things 6th February, 2016 Mwape wishes 21st August, 2011 Mwape knew that would have definitely been helpful to me back then when i was starting my university journey.

Firstly, the only constant in University is God. This might seem cliché, I know most people always start with the first point about God but in all honesty from my experience, Paul, in Hebrews 13:8, did know what he meant when he said that the Lord is the same yesterday, today and forevermore. He is the only constant in not only university but life. I have changed in so many ways from the time I came, friends have changed. If only I knew then that I must invest more time and love in the one being that does not change. I wish I knew then that I should hold on to the unchangeable constant; God in such a constantly changing environment. So put him first; read your Bible and pray EVERY DAY.

Secondly, it is okay to not have your life plan set out straight to the smallest detail but it is certainly important to have general direction. I began university when I was only 17 years old. I had no idea what my future plans were and all I knew is I was going to Mulungushi to study Economics. I had hardly researched on what it was about. I just knew saying I wanted to be an Economist sounded nice. After my feel of Micro-economics during my first semester I just didn’t have a connection with it. Thank goodness I found my real love, marketing. I was blessed to have found a career I have a passion for despite not knowing it from the start. Sometimes as you go on you realize things begin to unfold just the way they ought to be despite them not being how you planned it to be.

Thirdly, no, Solomon was not kidding when he said bad habits corrupt good morals. There are rarely, if any exceptions at all. Before I came to university it was just one of those Bible verses and I know so many people did mention it to me, it has only hit home now. I wish I knew that no one is ever really immune to getting influenced to leave the straight path and take what may seem like a joy ride, right into a thorn bush. Sometimes we tend to comfort ourselves by having a very relaxed definition of bad company. A friend was sharing with me what a certain Pastor said about bad company. She said the Bible encourages us to run towards holiness and perseverance, so based on that bad company is the kind of company that does not encourage you to run towards holiness. How I wish I knew that!

Fourthly, Failure is not the end of the world. What matters most is your attitude towards it. Be it academic failure, spiritual failure, failing your parents or even friends. Sometimes a certain experience is the wakeup call one needs. I remember failing one course in 2nd year and it felt like it was going to be the beginning of a failing spree. To my utter surprise it was all the push I needed. I realized I had to work extra harder if that wasn’t gonna happen again. I realized I am human and sometimes I'll fail but I can't just lay there. I need to get up and push harder.

Fifthly, Aim high. Just that; do your best and never ever aim for the lower standard. I am sorry to disappoint you readers but when I got to university I hardly cared about my grades. All I wanted to do was clear. It only hit me in 3rd year when there was some really great offer made by an organization whereby they pay for your fees till the end of your programme and then offer you a job with them in South Africa when you graduate. No prize for guessing what the criteria were for one to be eligible? Good grades! Such an amazing offer but I couldn’t attempt because my transcript was painted with C+’s! If only I knew then what I know now, good grades are important and I did not have to wait for 3rd year when I had to make points for me to realize that. Hard work always pays.

The sixth thing is that it is okay to not be in love when it feels the rest of the world is. When I was younger I always wanted to marry my high school sweetheart, high school came to an end and there I was still alone. And I was like yes! Maybe university? And there I was, going into 4th year not in love. There are times in life when it feels like cupid was feeling generous and he shot his arrows at everyone but you. When you step out of your room on campus you find couples strolling, when you log onto facebook, twitter, whatsapp it is flooded with couple love. Kind of leaves you wondering if something is wrong with you or cupid has something against you or maybe, just maybe, God has something different planned for you. The truth is, we rarely take the latter. God blesses at different times and with different blessing packages. Being alone is not a curse, it is okay to not be in love when everyone else is. As my daddy once told me, “Gods plans for our lives are different for each person. He does not make us like products of a Chinese factory.” I should have known that I needed to remember that he has a plan for me and I had to learn to be content with it.

Guard your heart! If only and if only I knew that not every guy who takes personal interest in you and your wellbeing actually means well for your being. This world is not a playground. The pain that comes with heart break sucks, it’s the kind of pain you don’t know what to do with! Mwape then should have known not to do or say things that will make her expectant and emotionally connected to guys, if I knew this concept it would have saved me a lot of nights that I spent listening to Adele and Taylor Swift. I should have known to save myself for someone who would love me enough to commit.  

Save and live within your means. During a lecture, I remember one of my favourite lecturers said “for as long as you have to borrow to buy, youre living out of your means”. Don’t spend money you don’t have on anything that you do not need. I only realized I should really start saving in my final year, but I certainly wish I did way before.

Have fun! Make sure you do have fun. You don't get to be in University all your life. You will have to graduate. So enjoy your experience. I am not the best person who can give you tips for fun but just remember that... you will have to give an account of your life to God.

Lastly, I wish I knew that Its okay to fail at doing all these things. Every day gives you a new slate; a clean slate. I remember a number of days my friends and I would sulk cause we were behind in school work. Or I sulked because of the days I lived without putting God first. You will certainly fail at some, if not most, if not all of them but dust yourself up, talk to God about it and start a new day refreshed and feeling motivated to try again.