I bet youre wondering whats with the question right? Well, you might not but im still going to have to tell you:-)
The other day, the 22nd of January, I was at Leopards Hill Cemetry for the 3rd time since the year began. Its been quite the start to a year. The first time was a memorial for a dear uncle who has been gone for just over a year. It was a beautiful event. You would have said the same if you were there. It was just nice to see his family evidently still celebrating his life and testifying how faithful God has been to them over this one year. The other two were for the burial of a cousin and a friends Aunt.
In the space of 27 days, 4 people that I know have died. 2 died in their sleep, 1 died after she underwent an operation and the last was unwell for sometime then eventually passed on at home.
Why am I saying all this? When the news of funerals kept coming pretty much every week, I was really going through a period of much thinking. I felt God was trying to speak to me. In my conversation with a friend after the three sudden deaths, I said:
" I feel shaken, they were all unexpected. Hmmm whats God trying to say. Its all too close to home. Im just scared for what else will unfold this year"
I have this thing that I do. Whenever something happens, I like to stop and think of what God is trying to say to me. Its actually very helpful. Here's some free advice: When you don't understand what's happening and why it's happening, take some to stop and think of why God allowed it and what he could be trying to say to you through the situation before you. You'll be amazed how circumstances will shape you for the better.
So, yes, I was thinking about what God was trying to say to me. Then it became more clear on the 22nd and I thought I'd share it with you and shake the dust off my blog.
While I was at the burial of my friends aunt, I went to the place where my own aunt, Aunt Mukalo, who passed on almost 4 years ago was buried. A tombstone was recently put there, so I wanted to see it and just have a moment. While there I took a picture and I sent it to the family for them to see. When I got home I was talking about it with Mwindula, my oldest brother.
Mwindula: So come next year where do you want to be buried?
Me: Errrrmmm *quite shocked and moved by his question but trying to pretend its cool*
Mwindula: Ha ha ha ha! You should have seen the look on your face! Priceless! Thats the problem, you love this life too much!
Me thinking: Well atleast one of us found this funny
Anyway, the thing is, It left me wondering if he was right. And he was. I have held on so tight to this world because i feel like I'll be here forever more than I'd like to admit. The deaths shook me, they hit me like a train, the scales fell off my eyes and I realized that I am NOT superhuman and I could die any day. This doesnt mean that I should live constantly thinking about death and living in constant fear of losing those dear to me. Mwindula was basically trying to me tell that I love the world. A new friend of mine and I made an agreement to memorize two verses a week together, and weird enough the memory verse at that time was:
1 John 2:15-17
Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world then the love of the father is not in him...... for the world and its desires pass away but the man who does the will of God lives forever.
I went into a moment of reflection. The truth is that the world and all its desires WILL pass away. Whether I like it or not, whether I am comfortable with it or not and whether i accept it or not. The main reason why I tend to find this world so nice is because of the desires I look forward to fulfilling in this life, and I must say that they are so exciting and pretty awesome. But truth is it isnt promised that I will live to fulfill these desires because the world as well as the very desires will pass away. So... what matters? The only thing that ultimately matters is doing the will of God. In that, eternal life is found as we are told in this passage; the man who does the will of God will live forever.
Back to my message to my friend. I see two problems with my message now that I've had time to digest it. No, its not the fact that I was shaken. Its okay to be shaken every once in a while. I'd like to think it is pretty healthy actually because it reminds us that this world is not our home. We are really just passing through.
1. I was scared.
The Bible says in John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.
As a child of God in such moments one needs to remember that God left his peace with us. Because of this amazing gift of peace, in the face lifes circumstances, our hearts must neither be troubled nor afraid.
2. I feared for the future.
The Bible says in Psalm 62: 8
Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.
Psalm 18: 30
This God–his way is perfect;the word of the LORD proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.
So what ought we to do when we think of the future? TRUST. Who? GOD. When? at ALL times. No, no exceptions, no matter how crazy and insane the situation looks, no matter how the future seems uncertain, still no exceptions. Why? His way is perfect. You may be wondering, what if you still have fears? Pour out your heart before him. What can he do anyway? He will be your refuge.
The two passages both bring out God's ability to be a refuge.
A refuge is a place of safety, relief or escape.
I now see that God can be all that to me if I trust him. My place of safety, my place of relief and my place of escape. And the awesome news is he can be all that and more to you too.
"There is a place of full relief, near to the heart of God.
A place where all is joy and peace, near to the heart of God"
So in the face of uncertainity and even as i learn to love God and let go of my grip on this world that is like vapor (hope you too see the silliness in trying to hold on tightly to vapor), I am made to remember that God is all I need to hold on to. He is all I need to love. He is all I need to obey. He is my shield. He is my refuge. God is all I need in this life.
I hope you now realize it too, he should be all in all to you whether or not you have to be buried come next year.
Tuesday, 27 January 2015
Thursday, 19 June 2014
I, Mwape Mbewe, am starting a university!
'I am starting a university', have been the words of at least one church leader every Sunday. At some point it began to sound like a statement i could get used to which had no deep meaning for me. It wasn't till my dad called me in the afternoon on Tuesday, 10th June asking if I was willing to volunteer at African Christian University.(ACU)Let me tell you the story. I promise to keep it short.
My dad knows of my ability to sleep till I can sleep no more as well as my ability to not get tired of sitting around and doing nothing. I guess he feared that i would be putting my abilities to great use during my 3month vacation and so he figured he had better get my teeth into something real quick. So being the lovely child i am ;) i was totally up for it and so psyched about it. After speaking to Uncle Ken Turnbull, the Vice Chancellor of the university, i was informed that my help was needed like 'yesterday'. During dinner my excited dad kept cracking jokes as his face was glowing with excitement about his daughters first day of work. My sister; Mwila and I had a good laugh about it. You have got to love his spirit:) A week later and i am still wondering whether it was excitement about me finally using my time for ACU, where he is chancellor, or excitement about getting me out of his house for a few hours, Id like to believe it is the former.
So the next day came, after like 17 minutes of convincing myself to get out of the comfort of my bed I finally got up and prepared for my day one at ACU. Dad dropped me off and I was well received by Uncle Ken who explained to me the work I would be doing for the next 3months. It then slowly started to dawn on me that ACU is real and I am really part of the large body of believers who are starting a University. That is how it all changed,
Okay, story over. I have been volunteering for just over a week. I have many thoughts about ACU of which I would like to share a few. The work God is doing here is beyond amazing. It has been such a blessing being surrounded by people who have dedicated their entire lives to Gods service. If the Bible used to put pictures of people whose lives apply to verses, their pictures would be right by Matthew 16:24-25 'Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow Me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.…'. Come to the ACU offices on any day and you will see the fulfilment these ladies and gentlemen have found in sacrificing their lives for this cause, with reference to the just mentioned verse, denying themselves. They have denied themselves the comforts of their homes and being so close to their families who they are probably so attached to. They literally uprooted their lives, some from USA and Canada. I am doing my degree, Bachelor of Commerce, in Kabwe which is a 2 hours drive from Lusaka, my home town. I am constantly coming back home to visit. I am home at least once every month because i miss my family, especially my 5month old niece Katongo, who I am madly in love with. Okay, my point is that I am in the same country as my family, I can easily pick up my phone and call them any second and feel a little better, but of course not better enough to keep me away for over a month. These lovely people who have come all the way from other continents have left their children, parents, siblings, nieces, nephews, and grand kids to start a life here. They cant randomly pick up their phones and call their families due to challenges like cost as well as time difference. Neither can they randomly head to the airport and fly back home for a weeks visit. In addition to that they are here having to adjust to new cultures. They fall ill here and there due to change in environment in addition to other possible reasons. I don't mean to rub it in their faces as to how much they have sacrificed. Or to brag about how my family is more accessible or how i do not suffer any culture shock from being in Kabwe(although there is a chance that i do lol). Well, my point is that its a 180degrees change. But they choose to stay, for the love of God and ministering through this University.
In addition to the sacrifice they are making, believe it or not this isn't a financial profit making venture for them, it is a soul winning venture as well as discipleship venture. They are not here to expand their bank accounts but to extend Gods kingdom. They are not getting paid for doing what they are doing here at ACU. I, personally, stand amazed after reflecting upon these facts about these people who have left the comforts of their homes.
When i sit and really think about this i am left asking myself what I am doing as a youth for Christ whom I claim to love. Especially as a youth who is starting a university. How am I contributing to ACU? I am absolutely grateful for this opportunity to interact with these people and see how much loving God can lead one to sacrifice for his Christ's sake. So much is happening here at ACU, seeing how joyful these ladies and gentlemen are as they labour is simply amazing. I can only pray that God answers our prayers as we pray for different aspects pertaining to this University and that his will may be done at the end of the day.
If you would like to know more about this University, do subscribe to receive our monthly updates and please visit our site for an even better understanding of what is happening. It is only with deeper understanding of what is happening as well as how much God's people all over the world are putting into this that your eyes will be opened, just as mine were not too long ago. Pray pray pray, as we know prayer may just be the most powerful tool mankind has.
*The grammar is as raw and unpolished as I am. But i do hope I drove my points straight home:)
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